Why Does God Hate Me?

"Why does God hate me?" is the question I feel like asking those closest to me. When God knows what I dread the most, hears my prayers, but still allows that thing to happen... I don't know about you, but it hurts. It hurts to know that an all-powerful God can place his hand on any situation and make it turn out differently but doesn't. And no matter what that situation ranges from -- a relationship, a job, a loved one dying, or finances -- it doesn't change that it hurts. Whatever situation you find yourself in while reading this, it hurts. I acknowledge that. I acknowledge that it sucks, and I acknowledge that those are the times when your responses to questions of "How are you?" get met with, "I'm just trying to keep the faith." When the concerned questions of "What are you praying" go no further than "God, help me!" Sometimes said through tears and snot, and other times said through anger and shouts. You're not alone. I've been there. I am there.


Music Worth Mentioning: I’ll Find You by Lecrae ft. Tori Kelly

"Is this even worth it?" I've been holding onto my purity. I've been tithing. I haven't retaliated. I've been making money legally. I stopped going there. I've stopped hanging out with those people. I don't do that anymore! I'm going to church.  "God, if you don't ________, I don't think I can do this much longer." "If one more _________, I'm done." Does that sound familiar?  We all have situations that make us doubt...question...What is this walk about? Is this Christian life even worth it?


Let Go Let God

When we do these comparisons, nothing good comes from it. We dig ourselves into a deeper pit of despair than before. What if there’s a better way? What must I do to get out of this pit and see the light? I think it’s summed up in one word: acceptance--otherwise known as “Let go and let God.” "Sometimes holding on does more damage than letting go."

Faith · Teacher Life

Preparation. Preparation. Preparation.

Every time August comes around, I have this awful reoccurring dream. It's the first day of school. Every thing is moving in slow motion. I'm panicking. I have no idea what I'm doing the first day of class. I arrive early. After clicking ferociously through files of past lesson plans saved on my computer, I race to the copy machine, only to find there's a long line because two out of three of the machines are jammed!